Families in Recovery

The Story of Families in Recovery

For many children of alcoholics, the story is similar.

It never occurred to me that things were not ‘normal’. Mom would fall asleep in the hallway. Dad would rage at everything and nothing until he passed out. We would never talk about it, no matter how terrible. That’s just how things were.

Maybe it was one parent, maybe it was both. Maybe dad couldn’t keep a job or maybe he was the CEO. Champagne or rotgut, penthouse or poorhouse, all children of alcoholics suffer. Regardless of background or story, children of alcoholics share a lot in common; fear, confusion, shame and loneliness.

Growing up in such a home, Scott Stamper decided something needed to be done.

As a young man, Scott started the path to healing with the support of a knowledgeable school counselor (Patrice Ristuccia, now a board member of Families in Recovery) and other caring adults. But it wasn’t until later when Scott started looking at the patterns in his life, his relationship with his parents and family, his choices that Scott really started to understand family alcoholism and its impact on his life.

What ensued was a period of many years of research, of talking with other children of alcoholics (COAs), and of self reflection for Scott to finally make peace with his childhood and his parents. And when Scott’s parents finally found recovery, Scott was ready to help them on their path to healing.

Families in Recovery is the result of a singular idea: children of alcoholics can learn to heal. It is the belief of Families in Recovery that through education, support and time, children of alcoholics can recover. To that end, we will offer education to children still in alcoholic homes, to adult children of alcoholics, and to those who provide the support network for COAs.

The question has been asked of us, why the name Families in Recovery? Why not COAs in Recovery? The answer is the mission: every member of an alcoholic/addicted family suffers. It is our belief that by supporting the individual, the family and the alcoholic (in that order) that we can serve the highest goal of moving families from crisis to recovery.

One of the first lessons we will teach is also one of the most important. COAs must learn to make peace with themselves, with the family, and with the alcoholic (again, in that order). How to make peace out of the turmoil, the anguish and the pain of an alcoholic childhood is the reason Families in Recovery has come to exist. When a COA finds peace, true healing has begun.

We are just starting out. Please contact us and let us know if you want to be contacted once we are fully running or if you want to share your thoughts on our mission or purpose.